Friday, June 6, 2014


On Monday, I woke up with the same headache I had gone to sleep with. I hate to say it but my mood was pretty bad. I was still very tired and was waking up to the same nightmare I saw the day before. Not only that, but it was the last week of school and it was "Spirit Week", which means that the kids dress in a specific theme every day. Finding clothes was hard enough, but trying to find theme clothes was even worse. It was either that, or they wear their uniforms and their uniforms were so badly wrinkled they looked like the kids slept in the suitcase with them. And, I still couldn't find the iron. Lucky for me--for all of us--the kids informed me that Monday was "pajama day and crazy hair day". Wonderful--the one thing we definitely already had accomplished.

One thing that made me smile on that hectic morning was Henry's reaction to waking up in the new house. He must have forgotten that we were moved in and he looked pleasantly surprised to find that he was still there. He waved his arms out and said with a happy smile, "House!" He definitely adjusted better to the new house than I thought he would--he didn't seem to miss the old house one bit. I found that very consoling and even took it as a "sign" that God did want us there, since Henry tends to get nervous and skittish if we sleep anywhere other than his own home.

I had to make school lunches even though I had meant to make them the night before. It had basically been forgotten, as we were all exhausted. Now I had to rummage through boxes to look for sandwich bags and food items such as bread. Even though the kids were all "dressed" and ready, they still ended up being late for school by the time I finished making the lunches.

When Dennis brought the kids to school, I had to release some of my feelings and had a good cry on the couch--one of the few items that were in the house. The house felt so foreign and empty; it didn't feel like it could ever be a home at all. Every time I tried to put something away, I had to clean first. If I wanted to put dry foods away, I had to clean out all the dead bugs in the cabinet first. If I wanted to put our toothbrushes away, I had to clean out the medicine cabinet. Nothing had been cleaned, and it wasn't just dirty, it was often full of dead bugs and/or cobwebs, my two most un-favorite things. I took that time for prayer though, and as I was pouring it all out, my phone rang and it was Mom, calling to see how I was doing. I felt like she was the answer to my prayer at that time and it felt really good to let it all out and talk to someone.

I did feel somewhat better after that and decided I should take a shower. I had been putting it off because the tub was so gross. I tried to clean it and managed to wipe away dead mosquitoes that had been smashed against the tub walls but the rust stains still stayed. I wasn't sure if the bathtub was really that gross or if I was just really that squeamish--probably a little of both. At any rate, I did take a shower but I did it with my sandals on.

Obviously, much of my day was spent unpacking and sorting. It was another stressful and hard day because trying to organize just isn't a talent of mine. I can do it to a point but after a short amount of time, my brain gets tired of the never ending puzzle and riddles that lie before my eyes: if I put the dishes in this cabinet, then it will close to the sink, but I can't put these glasses here because the shelves aren't tall enough, which means that they will have to be all the way over in that other cabinet that's on the other side of the kitchen and THAT doesn't make sense...Ugh. Unpacking, sorting and organizing just isn't my thing.

Dennis's day was much harder than mine as he was the only one dragging furniture in. Pretty soon we had our coffee table back, two end tables and a lamp. He dragged Lucy's dresser into her room and pretty soon our dresser. After that, we were able to get to the rest of the boxes that had been trapped at the back of the garage and soon the entire living room and foyer was full of boxes. Which to open? I felt so overwhelmed.

Later, I decided to go bring Anna to the little "park" that some neighbors told us about that's in the neighborhood. This "park" is literally in someone's backyard, and yet it's not on their property. It is owned by the city and for whatever reason, it is smack in the center of people's backyards. Had the neighbor not told us about it, we never would have known it existed.

Yes, even though it was a public park, I still felt like we were trespassing. The neighbors dogs seemed to agree as they kept barking at us.

We finished off Monday with our first supper in our new home. We still had no way to cook anything on the stove or microwave, but we had some chicken from the old house and Dennis grilled it. I had a hair appointment at 5:00 so I didn't eat with everyone. My first haircut since January. That's how crazy it's been. I relished that time of being back in familiar Chaska, even though we were gone only for a day. I relaxed as my hair was cut and it felt so good just to sit. Later, I even got myself a coffee at Caribou, knowing that it might be my last for a while since there is no Caribou Coffee in Young America.

One thing I learned about myself: I'm more dependent on my routine than I thought I was. I didn't realize how much I was going to miss being able to sit down during Quiet Time at the computer and catch up on emails or news on Facebook. We had no TV hook-up or computer Internet yet. I didn't really do much at Quiet Time except lay down for a bit and read a little. If I don't rest a little every day, I find that I'm not able to get through the rest of it very well, so I have to take time to rest. But other than that, I just kept unpacking and sorting and organizing.

I also realized that since the side of my brain that does all the problem solving was exhausted at night, my creative side wanted to relax by working on my rosaries. It's how I usually relax in the evening. But with no stove working, I had no way of baking the beads. It seemed pointless to make tons of roses and beads when we weren't sure when we would get a stove. So again, I would read in bed but I was so tired of reading and tired of unpacking. Dennis was gone again too--he didn't get back until 1:30 again because he was unhooking his computer from the old house. It was the very last thing we still needed to retrieve. I was so bored and lonely.

From here, I promise it gets better. I know it all sounds pretty depressing and I admit, my attitude and mood wasn't the best. But even though I had some really tough moments in these days, never once did I feel that God was not there. In fact, He felt closer than ever even though I didn't pray as often as I should. I felt like even though I could barely get through it all, He was supporting me through it.

And I knew this when I drifted off to sleep Monday night. I apologized to God for my sins and behavior and thanked Him for His help, but I also said as my parting prayer: "Never again, God. Never, ever, ever, EVER again will I move into a foreclosed house."


  1. I always see those sad, neglected, abused houses and feel sorry for them. Now you and your family have filled up one of those houses with noise and excitement. With children and tears and laughter and life. You are cleaning it up and clearing away cobwebs and making it a happy home again. I imagine that house being so happy you are taking care of it. Obviously, I've read way too many fairy tales in my lifetime, and I know you and Dennis are doing a tremendous amount of work and are feeling exhausted. But I'm glad you have rescued your house and will be making it your own home. And Henry seems to have given it his stamp of approval!

  2. I know what it's like when you have lots of stuff to organize and can't always figure out where to put it. If I were near you, I would help especially since i have time right now.

    I agree with the above comment. And your new neighbors are probably happy that a nice family moved into a foreclosed house. It's better for the neighborhood.

    That is weird about the public park being in the middle of backyards. It must be on some kind of easement.

    Your first paragraph made me laugh. Yay for pajama day!