For Lent, I'm working on giving up worrying. Actually, seeing that that is such a huge and impossible thing to give up, I'm instead focusing on trust. Again, it's hard to do because it's my habit to worry.
Even though we have an answer to Luke's health issues, the recent PANDAS diagnosis has started the worry again. How long will it take to get healed from the strep infection? Will the damage be permanent? Is it reversible? I had read somewhere that PANDAS can start up again with every infection. So does that mean the tic will come back?
But then I catch myself and realize what I'm doing. What good does it do to worry? It only causes me stress. Yesterday I fell asleep on the couch (I never do that) and then ended up sleeping for two hours, even though I slept well the night before.
A meditation from the diaries of St.Faustina:
On one occasion, the Lord said to me, Why are you fearful and why do you tremble when you are united to Me? I am displeased when a soul yields to vain terrors. Who will dare to touch you when you are with Me? Most dear to Me is the soul that strongly believes in My goodness and has complete trust in Me. I heap My confidence upon it and give it all it asks (Diary, 453).
On one occasion, I felt an urge to set to work and fulfill whatever God is demanding of me. I entered the chapel for a moment and heard a voice in my soul saying, Why are you afraid? Do you think that I will not have enough omnipotence to support you? At that moment, my soul felt extraordinary strength, and all the adversities that could befall me in carrying out God’s will seemed as nothing to me (Diary, 527).
My focus for Lent: Jesus, I trust in You. Jesus, I trust in You. Jesus, I trust in You.