So here is a little more information on our forclosed home.

The neighborhood seems to be nice, so that is a plus.

It has a very big backyard. That is a HUGE plus! It was one of my "must have's" on my list.

It is a 4 bedroom house. Again, a big plus and check mark on my "must have's".

It has a lot of square footage, mostly in the basement. So happy about this. Currently, our basement is slightly larger than a big master bedroom. All the kids are squished in there. It used to have more room, but when we first moved in, there was no room for storage, so Dennis used a small section of the basement to install shelves and a closet.

So those are the big pluses of the house and why we chose it in the first place.

The not-so-great things about the house:

• There are huge holes in the walls of nearly every room in the house, where it looks like someone took their anger out on.
• Many of the doors have been damaged or ruined, due to someone kicking them.
• Every carpet is ruined with mud/feces, and urine.
• The walls were either painted the grossest colors they could think of, and some of them have mixed paint where it's not even one specific color. Will need lots of primer, that's for sure!
• The front door is decaying. For real, it is crumbling apart.
• The fridge is broken.
• The stove may be broken. We don't know yet, it might just need some repairs.
• There is a washer but no dryer.
• There might be a bug infestation. Lots of bugs piled up in the basement.
• Mice droppings in the basement.
• Wires hanging from the ceiling in the basement.
• No fire alarms or carbon monoxide detectors, of which, the bank said, WE are responsible for before we can move in. (???)
• All the light switch plates are missing.
• All the plates for outlets are missing, making it dangerous for little fingers to poke in.
• Some pins are missing from the doors, which makes it dangerous because they can fall on little ones.
• There is no railing going down the basement which means on the opposite side of the wall, it is open, making it dangerous for the kids to go downstairs.
• The backyard is trashed and neglected.

These are just some things that I remember when walking through the house. There were more things that came up during the inspection. This is why part of me is dreading moving in. Not exactly a warm cozy home.

The frustrating part is money. The way things are looking right now, it will be very tight just to make the mortgage every month. Our main concern and goal will be survival. That may sound dramatic, but for lack of better words, that is exactly what it is. Making the mortgage every month, paying the bills, and making sure there is food on the table. Our first "update" will be the fridge and that's only because we basically don't have one. Our second concern will be a new door for safety reasons but even that I have no idea when we're going to be able to buy it. The carpets will be ripped out so at least we won't need to worry about breathing anything in that's unhealthy. We will be living like Laura Ingalls for quite a while.

So it's a lot to think about it and it's coming up fast. I am grateful for God who has this already figured out for us. I'm grateful He doesn't mind when I'm a brat. (As long as I'm not a brat to anyone else, that is. Which is why I'm sort of in hiding right now.)

Everything else aside, I'm confident that this is the house God has chosen for us. It meets everything on our checklist. But the irony that it's a total dump is complete God right there. He chooses the dump for the best places to become. He chose a cave for the King of Kings to born in; He chose a dump for one of the most famous shrines to be born (Lourdes). Yes, I know this house is meant to be ours. I love it already but dread the work in it.

Found a great quote from Ven.Archbishop Sheen the other day--it just jumped out at me: "Through poverty in earthly things, I can become rich in spirit."

That is the secret behind this house. That's the reason--I choose to believe--that God has chosen it. It's filled with gems of hardships and trials, of dirt and feces, of mouse droppings and dead bugs, of anger and poverty, but soon will be transformed by love. Hopefully, this house and these trials will make us better people. Hopefully we will become only more grateful, more humble because of it.